5 Regrets of The Dying
Read time: 4 minutes
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5 Regrets of The Dying
Years ago, a palliative care nurse documented the five most common regrets people share at the end of their lives.
Not regrets about money.
Not regrets about titles.
Not regrets about being busy enough.
Here’s what they actually said:
#5: “I wish I had let myself be happier.”
#4: “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.”
#3: “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.”
#2: “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.”
#1: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not what others expected of me.”
Pause with that for a moment.
Because buried inside every single one of these regrets is the same pattern:
Playing safe, staying silent, postponing joy, and choosing “should” over truth.
What struck me most wasn’t the regret itself:
It was how long people waited to honour what they already knew.
They knew they were exhausted.
They knew they were unfulfilled.
They knew they were living someone else’s definition of success.
But they kept going.
Because slowing down felt irresponsible.
Because choosing differently felt risky.
Because questioning the path felt uncomfortable.
I know this pattern too well, because I have lived it too.
For a long time, I stayed on a path that looked right on paper but felt quietly misaligned on the inside.
I kept moving, achieving, pushing – telling myself I’d pause later. Until one day, I finally did. And in that pause, I heard a truth I had been drowning out for years.
That moment didn’t change everything overnight. But it changed me. It was the beginning of choosing more consciously – of living a life that felt true, not just “good on paper”.
If you’re feeling that same quiet nudge beneath the noise, I invite you for a deeper, more conscious living:
To live more consciously, ask these 5 questions:
1. True to self:
Where am I still living by someone else’s expectations?
What would “true to me” look like this year?
2. Work and presence:
When does ambition feed me – and when does it start depleting me?
What does “enough” look like in my work life?
3. Emotional honesty:
What truth am I avoiding sharing – with myself or with someone else?
How might honesty deepen connection instead of disrupting it?
4. Relationships:
Who lights me up, but I haven’t reached out to in a while?
How can I make connection a rhythm, not an afterthought?
5. Joy:
What small moments bring me genuine joy – and how can I make more space for them?
What am I postponing that my 80-year-old self would tell me to do today?
The most painful regret is not failure.
It’s never giving yourself permission to live fully while you had the chance.
Will you wait for someday – or live fully now? Choose consciously.
Invitation for IWD “Give to Gain” Experience with Us
As you plan for International Women’s Day in 2026 – themed “Give to Gain” – we invite you to collaborate with us in creating an inspiring and meaningful experience for your teams.
For over a decade, Shenomics has been on a mission to shape mindful, inclusive leadership for women. We’ve partnered with 250+ organizations and guided 10,000+ women through transformative leadership journeys that drive real cultural change.
This IWD, we can support your initiatives through:
- Keynote Talks by me, Bhavna Toor, Founder & CEO of Shenomics – including my signature talk on Conscious Leadership, inspired by my bestselling book, The Conscious Choice
- Interactive Workshops and Fireside Conversations on Inspiring Inclusion, Allyship, and Mindful Leadership
- Custom panels and leadership dialogues designed for your audience
Here’s what our clients say:
“Bhavna is one of the most inspiring speakers I’ve ever hired – a perfect blend of data, emotion, and real behavior change.”
– Jessica Amortegui, VP, Org Capability & Talent Development, Moloco
“Bhavna, you were amazing speaker, the whole hall was buzzing with energy. I was such an honor to host you and learn from you.”
– Nivruti Rai, Country Head – Intel India
If this resonates, simply reply with a “Yes!”, and we’ll set up a short call in early January to explore options for your IWD 2026 event.
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Warmly,
Bhavna.